Why do I feel so heartbroken that he doesn't want to spend his first night back with me. It was his choice to get drunk last night and not feel good today, and he's "so tired" even though he slept the whole way home. And he just spent a week with four girls and I know he wants to see me but it just sucks. It sucks because he knows as well as I do that now, because of how busy next week is, we're going to go two weeks without spending a night together. And I hate that and I'm upset that he doesn't want to see me.
I know it's stupid. It's his first night home, he's had a long week and he's tired. I know I shouldn't care, but I do. I hate just being another girl. I would kill for him to say "Come over. I want to see you." Why is that so hard? Isn't this always the root of the biggest problem we ever have. Why can't I just be put first for once in this relationship.
I hate that I love him more than he loves me. I don't know how it got this way. I hate it so much.
